Tuesday, May 14, 2013

A Story About Cake

Once upon a time, there were six friends who were looking for something to eat: Andrew Ryan, Frank Fontaine, Brigid Tenenbaum, Zachary Comstock as well as Robert and Rosalind Lutece.

They couldn't decide what they wanted to eat. Zachary wasn't hungry, so he volunteered to be the one to head out and buy food for them. Brigid said she wasn't too hungry either, but would shell out some money for their food. Andrew wanted to have Italian while Frank, who was craving for dessert, opted for something sweet. Robert and Rosalind, being a couple, decided that they wanted to have cake.

They decided to go with the cake, so they handed Zachary the money and waited for him to return.

Since he thought that getting this awesome new video game called Big Rigs was a swell idea, Zachary bought it and went home instead.

Moral Lesson: Comstock's a douche for putting his wants above the needs of everyone else at their expense, and everyone (even Brigid, who was allergic to cake but shared some money out of the goodness of her heart) has an equal and inalienable right to be pissed. Also, this is a totally terrible piece of fiction loosely based on the Bioshock series and does not allude to any relevant current event, whatsoever. Really.


  1. HAHAHAH what did I miss? Such a random post here

  2. This isn't election-related in any way. XD